You finally completed your masterpiece. This is the one that’s going to put you on the map: 99 pages of gut wrenching dialogue, chase scenes and unforgettable characters. All that you need to do is to get it into the hands of the newest hotshot Hollywood producer and you’ll be swimming in money and fame.
The only problem is that a seven foot bouncer is blocking the doorway to the hippest film festival party. You’re a bit rusty on your martial arts skills, so you’re not going to be able to muscle your way through this one.
Don’t worry, here are some tricks to help you sneak into a Sundance Film Festival party, or just about any other.
Flattery Will Get You Everywhere
Remember – you’re a nobody. If you weren’t a nobody, you’d be in that party right now. So be nice to the doorman. It doesn’t hurt, and you might be surprised at how far being nice will get you.
You Belong There
Whatever party you’re going to, just keep telling yourself that you’re supposed to be there. It’s YOUR party. This will give you the air of confidence that doormen and bouncers are looking for. Sometimes that’s all that it takes – just walk straight up and through the doorway. Ok, so it doesn’t work all that often, but, when it does, you’ll really feel like you’ve pulled something off.
The Badge in The Pocket
When you first arrive at a film festival, you’re given a badge. Everyone gets ’em: directors, writers, producers, grips, best boys and the craft service people. Walking around with your badge on the outside of your shirt, though, makes you look like a loser. Kind of like the kid who wears the concert t-shirt to school the next day. So what the hipsters started doing is taking their badges and slipping them into a breast pocket.
To take advantage of this method, all that you need is an official festival lanyard – the little thing that goes around your neck and holds the badge. Go up to the festival people and tell them that you misplaced yours. They should give you another one. Slip the lanyard around your neck and put the end of it in your pocket. You’re now one of the elite who is too cool to walk around with their badge showing.
The best way to manipulate this into getting into a party is by taking your cell phone out and chatting away. Then walk boldly by the doorman and into the party of your choice.
The Smoke Break
This trick requires a maximum of confidence and – most important of all – props. The Smoke Break is the one trick that’s especially tailored to sneaking into a Sundance Film Festival party.
You’ll need to be a smoker – or at least good enough to pretend to be one. In your free hand, carry a beer cup full of beer. Even better, if this is a party sponsored by a brewer or distillery, have the sponsoring drink in your hand.
Once you have your smoke in one hand and the beer in the other, you’ll have to ditch any coats that you are wearing. Approach the door guy blocking your way. Don’t approach him straight on, do it sideways, like with a dog, so you just appear in his peripheral vision.
Before he can ask you any questions – and this part is important – strike up a conversation by asking the Bouncer, “Hey, can we smoke out here?” If you’re luck holds, he push you inside the party, helpfully explaining where the smoking area is. And you’re in….
This trick usually only works in cold weather Festivals, so Sundance is naturally the perfect place to try it out.